The Fire – a microstory

One by one, she lovingly lined up six toy cowboys on the shelf above the cot.

There they stood each night, protecting him from the bad guys as he slept.

The fire was strong though.

Not even one made it out alive.


 

 

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About Donna-Louise Bishop

I'm a freelance reporter and creative writing tutor living in the beautiful county of Norfolk UK. I blog. Wife to Ben, mummy of two young boys. Cake rocks.
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12 Responses to The Fire – a microstory

  1. That was a heavy one. Just out of curiosity, why six?

  2. mhparkin says:

    I liked it. I was a bit bewildered by the cowboys at first, but then the ending was a great twist and unexpected. The number 6 could be to do with the devil, you know 666 being known as the devils number for some reason. One thing I would have changed though is the cowboys to soilders so that they really end up failing the boy. Overall, awesome flash fiction! 😄 really captured me.

    • Donna-Louise Bishop says:

      I picked cowboys following a prompt from Yeah Write – have you heard of them? They are an online writing community. If you like microstories I would give them a look. The number six makes it all the more haunting when you compare it to that doesn’t it? Thank you for taking the time to read and commenting.

  3. reallygina says:

    Heavy is good! It was counter to what I expected which is always a great thing!

  4. Katrina Begg says:

    I like the unexpected twist at the end.

    • Donna-Louise Bishop says:

      Thanks for taking the time to read and comment. I’ve been unable to go back and read it since I wrote it 😥

  5. Joe Ormerod says:

    Don’t know if this is what you were thinking, but brought to mind an orphanage…maybe the “she” was a Nun. Then a horrible fire that no one survived. Haunting, and we’ll done!

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